10 Tips to Get You Through a BreakUp

Going through a rough break-up? Join the club, there are tons of people everywhere going through the same thing. The only thing I can really say for sure about it is:

 You live and you learn, and it's not always easy, but it's always necessary.

It's hard to understand why things happen, and it's even harder to break yourself out of the habits and comfort level you were once on. Sometimes, when you're in a relationship for a long time, living together, sharing pets and cars, you become complacent. Complacent means "pleased, especially with oneself or one's merits, advantages, situation, etc., often without awareness of some potential danger or defect". You are sometimes so comfortable and used to a relationship and it's circumstances, that you don't realize the problems that are apparent. You get so used to someone, that sometimes even when they have done substantial damage emotionally to you, you feel like your life can't go on. But trust me, it can, and it does. You shouldn't spend too much time dwelling. It's normal to want to escape from the world for a while after a break up. But remember, there are other opportunities out there in the world for you. Other people who understand you, and your circumstances, and believe it or not, someone that wants you, exactly as you are. 

It's important that you remember life goes on. Here are some simple steps I found to help you get through a break up, written by Donna Engelau:

1.Give yourself time to grieve:

Don't be afraid of whatever feelings come up during a breakup, whether it's sadness, fear or anger. Let your feelings surface and accept them. 

2.Write it out:

Keep a journal, and write an entry each evening. 

3. Clean it up:

Clean your house, your desk, your car or even a small area of your home or office. Clutter creates "emotional stickiness".

 

4. Get physical:

 Even though you might not feel like going to the gym, this is the time to do it.

 

5. Spend time with friends and by yourself:
Whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, it's important to adopt personality traits from both types.

6.Nurture yourself:
Touch is a key way to nurture yourself. It's important. I recommend people get massages or trade a back rub or foot rub with a friend in a nonsexual way

7. Eat healthful foods:
Foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids like cold-water wild fish, flaxseed and walnuts might help improve your mood. Green leafy vegetables provide folic acid and other B vitamins that seem to help prevent depression.

8. Maintain structure"
Don't allow your breakup to envelop your life to the point that you lose your moorings. Stick to routine — and pursue your interests. That's one of the surest ways to help get over a breakup and meet people with whom you share common interests.

9. Believe in yourself and your own self-worth:
Identify 10 good qualities about yourself, write them down on sticky notes and place them around the house where you're likely to see them during the day. Even if you don't read them, giving yourself subliminal messages can have a powerful effect.

 

10. Be grateful:

 Make a "gratitude" list toward the end of your grieving period. Write down all of the things that are still good in your life despite your loss. It's critical to recognize that there are still things remaining and to remember what those things are because they will help carry you forward.

 

Wanna Know Some Things NOT To Do?

 Check some of these out:

 

• Don't make any big life decisions like changing jobs or moving to a new house. Your judgment will not be its best right after you break up with someone.
• Don't use alcohol or drugs to help numb your pain. They'll cause you to spiral downward. Alcohol depresses the central nervous system and can lead to increased depression over time.
• Don't jump into a new relationship too quickly. You're more likely to repeat the mistakes that you made in the relationship you just ended. While it's tempting to try to fill the void, it's unwise in the long run because you need time to reflect on why your relationship didn't work and what you can change going forward.

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