Every year, since 2004, I dread this day. I hate the urge I get to go buy my father a card. But where do I put it? I certainly cannot give it to him. I thought about bringing one to where we spread his ashes, but I'd be so personal in that card, telling him so much about what he's missed, I wouldn't want someone to pick it up and read it. He was a great father, he truly was. I should say is, because to this day, the lessons he had taught me during the time I had with him help me to become a better person. Sometimes, especially days like this, and on the anniversary of his death, and on his birthday, I wonder why. Of all people, why did I have to lose my father. He wanted to be there. He loved me. There are so many people who don't want to be with their children but he loved us, so much. Sometimes he had a funny way of showing it, but God did he love us. I'm angry. I know I shouldn't be, but I'm angry at the world. Why couldn't he be at my sixteenth birthday party, or my high school graduation. Why couldn't he be there to congratulate me for getting into all the schools I applied to. He would be so proud. Why isn't he here to be a loving, caring, kind grandfather to my nephews? I just don't get it. I miss him so much sometimes. I know other people go through this but he wasn't anyone else's Dad. He was MINE. I wish he was still here to celebrate days like this with. I miss you, so, so much Dad. I love you every single day, and for the rest of my life. Happy Father's Day Dad.
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