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Sunday, May 1, 2011

Today's Phobia

Today I'm going to do something a little different. While I was google-ing cool/weird/random phobias I can across a forum where people discussed their random fears and this struck me for some reason. Here is the exact post: 

"I'm scared of what's likely to be the opposite of what most people fear. I'm afraid of hearing heartbeats, or breaths- that accounts for my habit of blasting my Mp3 while I wait for sleep to come. I can't stomach listening to my mother or relatives breathe... and live. The emotion we feel with regards to an issue can be compounded when compared to the alternative e.g. we can only properly savour sweetness after having tasted sourness incarnate.

Breathing and beating hearts remind me of just how transient and fleeting life is, how tenuous the line between life and death can be- blurred in places, and disappearing altogether in others. Breathing, of course, is an affirmation that one still lives, but I'd inevitably wonder- how long before these now-effortless breaths falter and cease? How many more times will this chest rise before the eventual collapse?

It sickens me sometimes to hear my own breathing- it's the ticking of the clock that brings me closer to my doom, a clock that cannot be rewound. I'm thinking of taking my degree in medicine, but some doctor I'd make if I can't even handle breathing without... my own practically ceasing out of terror." 

I'm not exactly sure why I kept reading it all, but it sort of intriguing. Just knowing someone actually fears the sound of a heartbeat and the sound of "living" is so bizarre to me. Do any of you guys have a similar fear?

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